When You Got It, You Got It

Tuesday was the first time The Tortoise and I went to the gym to do more than lay poolside with a good book. I have always been the Queen of Cardio. My favorite apparatus at the gym is typically an elliptical, although the stair-stepper comes a close second. It has been a couple of years … Continue reading When You Got It, You Got It

I Look Better Naked

I'm starting to understand the allure of nudist colonies. The image of my big butt mocking me in the Target fitting room mirrors today will forever burn in my brain. Most of the time I only see myself coming, never going. There are no 360 degree set of mirrors in my house. It was quite … Continue reading I Look Better Naked

The Potty Dance

This week’s memoir writing prompt by The Red Dress Club, was hosted by Jennifer of Whispatory. She asked us to write a memoir based on a memory of a school trip we took. Stupid Sister Anna Rose. I told her I needed to go to the bathroom like a million times. She didn't listen. She … Continue reading The Potty Dance

I Have More Insurance

I felt like Evelyn Couch (Kathy Bates) today from the movie Fried Green Tomatoes: [Evelyn is cut off in a parking lot] Evelyn Couch: Hey! I was waiting for that spot! Girl #1: Face it, lady, we're younger and faster! [Evelyn rear-ends the other car six times] Girl #1: What are you *doing*? Girl #2: … Continue reading I Have More Insurance

Careless Consummation

Last weekend was the first time in ten years DW and I vacationed without children. Since I was a single mom when we met, and we have no family living near us, it has never been just the two of us, except for our honeymoon. (Once we shipped both kids to my parents for a … Continue reading Careless Consummation