I heard her talking, but the words were just bouncing around the room. My hands began to sweat a little.
No tomato products or other acidic vegetables
No acidic fruits
No fatty meats or fried foods
For six weeks…and then we will reevaluate.
“So…what CAN I eat?” I asked tentatively, “Like for breakfast?”
My brain visualized the stellar menu of two cups of coffee and the cheese and sausage English Muffin sandwich I had eaten a few hours earlier.
“Eggs. That would be an excellent source of protein in the morning.”
“I hate eggs.”
“How about oatmeal? But avoid too much butter, raisins or berries.”
I was beginning to wonder if it had been worth a trip to the doctor. For weeks I have been having trouble swallowing, my diaphragm or upper half of my stomach has been in spasms almost 24 hours a day, causing the muscles to be sore, and then there is this whole old-person-flatulence, something smells like it died inside my body issue that I don’t really want to talk about. But I did. And now I’m not allowed to eat anything for the next six weeks while I take prescription strength Prilosec for something called Dyspepsia. I also had my blood drawn to check my Thyroid (I have hypothyroidism) to rule anything else out. But for now, I wait. And at the end of six weeks hopefully have no more symptoms so that I can start introducing foods back into my diet. I’ll need to keep a food journal to mark which ones inflame the digestive system. If the symptoms persist, then I will have to endure a scope.
Now you know me up close and personal, flatulence and all.
(And I thought having to get up a billion times in the middle of the night to pee was bad.)
Instead of coffee or tea I walked around the house in a daze, gripping a steaming hot cup of water this morning, just so I could feel balanced. My muscles twitched and danced making me wonder how in the world this diagnosis could be correct, but I’m willing to try just about anything at this point. However, I must say I am a little concerned to read that one of the side effects of the generic form of Prylosec (Omeprazole) can be muscle spasms. Isn’t that what put me here in the first place?
So although I had thought maybe I really should just ditch this whole “Friday Flip Off” thingy since truly, I’m not much of a complainer and try to be more creative than four-letter-words, I felt that this week’s medical news warranted at least one flip. Okay, maybe all ten digits in light of the fact I am hosting a Margarita party here on Saturday night and can’t even take one sip.
And in the spirit of Friday Flip Offs – I might as well lovingly salute those of you who write ridiculous comments. You have been deleted. Enough said.