“You wouldn’t mind filling in as a chaperone for our third grade field trip, would you? We still need one more parent volunteer.”

Would I mind? Really? You mean do I dream nightly about an hour ride on a school-bus with 60 crazy children, wrangle wandering and distracted kids through a museum, the state capitol and eat a brown bag lunch on the floor because there aren’t enough seats for the bazillion schools that are taking the same field trip at the SAME TIME, try to tactfully win an argument with an 8-year-old that the gloves she is wearing don’t belong to her (really? I’m supposed to believe that you brought TWO pairs of gloves, the stolen purple ones on your hands I just purchased The Hare on Sunday and the blue ones you are holding?) and then hop on the bus for an hour ride home, play hang-man with someone who picks words they can’t spell while wondering  if the child in front of me is always that pale or is now experiencing motion sickness? (How willing am I too sacrifice my hat?)Especially two days before Christmas vacation and I still have piles of laundry to sort through, bags to pack, last-minute gifts to purchase, a class party to finish facilitating and of course, figure out how to get a replacement Book Nook when everybody is sold out and the one we purchased DOESN’T WORK!!!

“Why, no, of course not. I’d love to help you out. What time do we leave?”

Sigh.

That, was my Monday.